It has been warming up here and last night after the girls were put down I slipped outside and sat on our little porch awhile.  The sun was still making the sky a blue color, but the few trees left (the land owner is slowly taking them down) around our community were stark black.  It was cooler outside and I just wanted some quiet.  At first all I could hear was the quiet of the neighborhood, but then as one minute turned to a few I could hear the bugs and the birds and the various country creatures making their sounds.  I could hear cars turning into driveways down the road and neighbors shuffling their locks and closing their windows.  We are such a sensitive creature.  It only takes us time to grow accustomed to our  environment.  A few years (or even months) after a birth and no matter what the mother worked through in labor it is almost all forgotten, and her heart  yearns  for another.  A man stops drinking  caffeinated  drinks and a few months later even a sip of coffee leaves him feeling jittery, on edge, and wired.  Turning off the local television  broadcasting  will leave you almost horrified some time later when you witness an insulting television program or a body soap commercial.  We were made extremely sensitive for a reason, and although I do not claim to know why, I have to believe it was for a purpose.

I was only out for a short while before my husband led out Little W by the hand to show her where I was.  She had gotten quite worried when she searched the house for me after waking.  I brought her on my lap and told her about the quiet.  We looked at the black trees, which are normally brown and green and vibrant.  We watched the stars and the clouds that could still be seen. We listened to spring bugs calling to their mates, and even a few dogs howling from far off.   Even though everything is the same, things look differently in the dark.  

After my daughter went back to bed I thought more about the sensitivity of light and darkness.  How we can become accustomed to seeing things in one way because of what light illuminates it.  How often do we accept what is in front of us because we are seeing it with dulled vision…

I am still thinking on these things…

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